It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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