omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Randomize
