I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
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