Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
