well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
