I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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