I cockslap morals
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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