I want to walk on stilts...naked
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
