hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
