Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
