I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize