I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Randomize
