you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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