i may or may not be watching the land before time
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
God, you're like boner-b-gone
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
