Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
