She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Randomize
