Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
