im drinking this country out of the recession.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
