I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
