just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Boobs are out for the taking
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
