I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
