I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
You left your phone here
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