i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
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