thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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