no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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