Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
