She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
