well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize