he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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