and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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