butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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