The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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