Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
