is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I love you. Go after that dick
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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