Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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