Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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