talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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