also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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