How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
