I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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