How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
