where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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