ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
