...so i touched it.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
