Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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