So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
