I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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