At least make sure they are 18
Why
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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