Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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