Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
